As a parent, I’m appalled. As a human being, I’m disgusted. One does not parent over the internet. One does not go around firing off guns teaching children lessons. Her conduct was immature, but understandable for an adolescent. His…?
At first I was inclined to agree with punishment, but then another part of me approaches it more as lesson since she can express opinion. There was a teachable moment right there, because it’s obvious she either glosses over or is ignorant of the things others do for her, in this case, her parents. I’d be designing something that served as a reminder of those routine things that are essential in her life she chooses to ignore.
What would you have done? Honestly, sometimes when I think about it, parenthood scares me. How does one strike a balance? I don’t want my kids to hate me but I don’t want them to disrespect me either.
I’m past this stage, since my daughters are 27 and in three weeks, 20. Communication matters, reasoning matters, punishment is a last resort (btw, I don’t believe in spanking children, not that one would a 15 yo) but grounding in various ways if necessary.
In this case, the issue is opinion and lack of appreciation, seeing her work as somehow more difficult and out of balance with others in the family. Involvement in the doings of those things if possible, deprivation of them, and serious discussion.
Such problems often are symptomatic, begun long before the behaviour manifests, but once there, that would be the way I’d go, and then set right whatever else goes on there that is out of kilter.
Parenting can be scary, but common sense, effort, love, caring, and developing lines of communication and respect for others will take anyone a long way.
Could he not have had the cigarette before/after he made the video? Or was it for filmic effect?
He shouldn’t be looking at her Facebook anyway, it’s just teenage rambling. Silly hick. Poor kids gonna end up being a skanky coked up prostitute.
I can’t help but agree with you! The more you push your kids the more they rebel (especially during the teenage years). I don’t know why parents don’t get that, it is not rocket science!
Parenting isn’t so bad if you can like yourself OK. I think we teach people to hate themselves for a variety of reasons, and it gets passed to the children. The trick to good parenting is self-acceptance and compassion. When we don’t feel like we need to offset our own badness it’s easier to refrain from self-indulging our children to make up for our hidden lack. Of course, I am a mother of perfect 15 yo old. She does swear some and never makes her bed, but I’m OK with that as long as she’s kindly to others.
I was speechless when I watched this yesterday. I felt his pain. His reaction was kneejerk but I do understand it. I thought the grounding was probably appropriate at least to some level. The gun shocked me but could be local custom for that area — it looked like cowboy country whereever that is. (There was no excuse for that damn cigarette though!)
I remember doing some things when I was that age that hurt my mother and I have been remorseful for it my entire life. I am glad she didn’t publish it. I agree with the commenter on a teachable moment, more communication and sometimes a parent has to suck up the hurt. I don’t think it’s a bad thing to keep an eye on your children’s internet activity though.
At the end of the day do you really want your dirty laundry all over the internet?
Exactly, I don’t think it is right to display such things all across the Internet. It’s very immature and childish but then again the girl is a teenager. So I am not really sure what to say about this. I just think he shouldn’t have gunned down the laptop, confiscating it would probably have sufficed.
Awww, we all do some terrible things as teenagers, which are best left unmentioned.
This was way overboard, though I do understand where he is coming from. However, this sort of behavior seems, at least to me, to be encouraging violence and that is really f***ed up, pardon my French.
what are your thoughts about the header? should i change it? or does it look fine? :p
hey-o, i gave you that liebster blog award thingy if you want it, it’s yours. hopefully it will give you some more visitors. not like you need them. hit my page for deets and what to do now. oh, yes, there are actions to take! lol. – mother
I am mad that my daughter was using the internet to make comments about our family. I think I will make a video of me putting my daughter down and shooting her laptop with a gun and post it to YouTube and Facebook.
Ria In The City 
I wrote a whole thing about this today !
I am going to check it out! 🙂
Went to college while in high school? Hmmm.
As a parent, I’m appalled. As a human being, I’m disgusted. One does not parent over the internet. One does not go around firing off guns teaching children lessons. Her conduct was immature, but understandable for an adolescent. His…?
He went a bit too far with this one, I think the ‘shooting of the laptop'(as it shall be known as henceforth) was uncalled for!
However, I believe he should have grounded the teenager.
At first I was inclined to agree with punishment, but then another part of me approaches it more as lesson since she can express opinion. There was a teachable moment right there, because it’s obvious she either glosses over or is ignorant of the things others do for her, in this case, her parents. I’d be designing something that served as a reminder of those routine things that are essential in her life she chooses to ignore.
What would you have done? Honestly, sometimes when I think about it, parenthood scares me. How does one strike a balance? I don’t want my kids to hate me but I don’t want them to disrespect me either.
I’m past this stage, since my daughters are 27 and in three weeks, 20. Communication matters, reasoning matters, punishment is a last resort (btw, I don’t believe in spanking children, not that one would a 15 yo) but grounding in various ways if necessary.
In this case, the issue is opinion and lack of appreciation, seeing her work as somehow more difficult and out of balance with others in the family. Involvement in the doings of those things if possible, deprivation of them, and serious discussion.
Such problems often are symptomatic, begun long before the behaviour manifests, but once there, that would be the way I’d go, and then set right whatever else goes on there that is out of kilter.
Parenting can be scary, but common sense, effort, love, caring, and developing lines of communication and respect for others will take anyone a long way.
Could he not have had the cigarette before/after he made the video? Or was it for filmic effect?
He shouldn’t be looking at her Facebook anyway, it’s just teenage rambling. Silly hick. Poor kids gonna end up being a skanky coked up prostitute.
I can’t help but agree with you! The more you push your kids the more they rebel (especially during the teenage years). I don’t know why parents don’t get that, it is not rocket science!
Parenting isn’t so bad if you can like yourself OK. I think we teach people to hate themselves for a variety of reasons, and it gets passed to the children. The trick to good parenting is self-acceptance and compassion. When we don’t feel like we need to offset our own badness it’s easier to refrain from self-indulging our children to make up for our hidden lack. Of course, I am a mother of perfect 15 yo old. She does swear some and never makes her bed, but I’m OK with that as long as she’s kindly to others.
That just shows that you are a wonderful mother!:) I will keep this tip in mind, for when I am a parent :p
I was speechless when I watched this yesterday. I felt his pain. His reaction was kneejerk but I do understand it. I thought the grounding was probably appropriate at least to some level. The gun shocked me but could be local custom for that area — it looked like cowboy country whereever that is. (There was no excuse for that damn cigarette though!)
I remember doing some things when I was that age that hurt my mother and I have been remorseful for it my entire life. I am glad she didn’t publish it. I agree with the commenter on a teachable moment, more communication and sometimes a parent has to suck up the hurt. I don’t think it’s a bad thing to keep an eye on your children’s internet activity though.
At the end of the day do you really want your dirty laundry all over the internet?
Exactly, I don’t think it is right to display such things all across the Internet. It’s very immature and childish but then again the girl is a teenager. So I am not really sure what to say about this. I just think he shouldn’t have gunned down the laptop, confiscating it would probably have sufficed.
Awww, we all do some terrible things as teenagers, which are best left unmentioned.
Ummm, “the apple not falling too far from the tree” is what I keep coming back too…
I can’t say I don’t agree 😉
I found that we tend to parent like our parents did…even though I tried not to do so. So the question becomes, what is he REALLY teaching this teen?
Exactly!
So you mean I am going to be like my mom? I wouldn’t mind that at all! 🙂
Gosh. Was I just born yesterday? How come I didn’t know how viral this has been going. For someone who’s on Facebook 24/7, I suck.
But dude’s laptop shooting and gun-bragging suck more, methinks.
methinks youthinks right :p
This was way overboard, though I do understand where he is coming from. However, this sort of behavior seems, at least to me, to be encouraging violence and that is really f***ed up, pardon my French.
Hardly a Ward Cleaver type. Would June have held the camcorder for this?
hahah thanks for dropping by 🙂
does the blog have a new look or is it my eyes? me likey!
haha yes it is! I was inspired by you 😀
Thank you!
it’s supercool!
what are your thoughts about the header? should i change it? or does it look fine? :p
hey-o, i gave you that liebster blog award thingy if you want it, it’s yours. hopefully it will give you some more visitors. not like you need them. hit my page for deets and what to do now. oh, yes, there are actions to take! lol. – mother
Congratulations and Thank you! I have been wanting to do an award post but I have been incredibly LAZY! I will get to it soon!
I am mad that my daughter was using the internet to make comments about our family. I think I will make a video of me putting my daughter down and shooting her laptop with a gun and post it to YouTube and Facebook.
Capt. Logic rides to the rescue
haha now that you put it that way :p